My friend, Rene, blogged about an article on Boundless Line referencing some quotes from Dr. Albert Mohler and Dr. John Piper on singleness. I’ve known Rene almost since I moved to southern California, and for a scientist, he’s a great guy!
Occasionally, we exchange emails about thoughts on marriage or dating, or more often, the Dodgers, Trojans, and Bruins. His final point is a pretty good one:
I love high ideals. I need them because they provide something to aim for. But I live in reality where I fall short of those ideals. The people in the 6 categories above need help and I’m sure they feel the intramural food fight over whether marriage is the normative ideal is too removed from their reality.
Along the same lines, Boundless has another post on
surrendering the desire to be wed. There’s some really good stuff there. Things that I’ve spent time talking with my parents about. Things I’ve had to confess to the Lord.
Unmet desires remind us that God is our source of help and provision. Hannah is another example; she prayed to God in agony over her unmet desire — to have a child. God responds by granting her request, not chastening her. Squelching a godly desire has the potential to make us less dependent on God, not more. Instead, respect the desires God has given you and continue to ask Him for good gifts.
That’s a good warning.
One of the comments on the article says, I think a lot of singles are fearful of admitting a desire to get married. It makes a person vulnerable, to talk about that. I can relate to that. The couple of times that it’s come up in my small group Bible study in the past several years, the discussion doesn’t really go anywhere. I do have to remind myself that it is not a bargain to be made with God – that once I become ok with being single, I’ll instantly be ready to be married. That’s a fallacy.